God Spinner

I admit it! I’m a God Spinner!! I do not apologize for it!!

I recently read a book (some of my DS moms will know which book I am talking about) that made a reference to God Spinners. The author defines God Spinners as people who believe that everything that happens in their life is orchestrated by God.

Okay, so if that’s what you call it I’m guilty!!

I believe that everything that happens in my life is controlled by God, both the good and the bad. I don’t believe anything can happen in my life that God doesn’t allow.

There are countless passages in the Bible that proves this.

How about the story of baby Moses? Do you think it was a coincidence that it was Pharaoh’s daughter that happened to find him??

Do you think it was a coincidence that after the widow woman fixed her last handful of meal and oil for Elijah she never ran out of meal and oil until the Lord sent rain upon the earth??

Do you think it was a coincidence that David killed Goliath with a slingshot??

Do you think it was a coincidence that Daniel was thrown into a Den of Lions and wasn’t harmed??

Do you think it was a coincidence that the three Hebrew boys were thrown into the fire yet walked out without even the smell of smoke on them??

Those were NOT coincidences my friend!! Those were ALL GOD!!! I could go on, but I think I have proven my point.

So, I am an absolute God Spinner; although I do not like that term. I believe that from the time I was conceived, God had a plan for my life.

Isaiah 44:24 Thus saith the Lord thy redeemer, and He that formed thee from the womb, I am the LORD that maketh all things;

Jeremiah 1:5 Before I formed thee in the belly I knew thee;

Have I always had my eyes open to His working in my life? NO!

I really believe we miss out on so many blessings because we are too busy to pay attention to God’s hand in our lives.

Sometimes I think God would love to knock us in the head and say “Wake up! That was ME!!!”

I can’t begin to list the many ways that God has worked in my life.

I can look back on so many instances in my life and say, “that was no coincidence” or “that was no accident”.

So let me share a few of them with you:

It was no accident that God placed me in an amazing family!! I’m so blessed to have such Godly parents. I can honestly say that I loved growing up in a Baptist Preachers’ home. I have such great memories of my Mom hosting Preachers and Missionaries in our home, and sitting listening to Daddy talk with some great men of God! Priceless!!! I wouldn’t trade it for anything.

It was no accident that at the age of 13, I went to Sand Mountain Bible Camp and gave my heart and life to Jesus. The Jesus I had heard about all of my life became real to me!!! Where would I be without him??

It was no accident that as a 13 year old girl, I became friends with a boy whom I have been happily married to for the past 15 1/2 years. He keeps me laughing and loving life!! I am a lucky girl to be loved by such a wonderful man!!

It was no accident that at the age of 19 while expecting my first baby that God sent me another expecting mom as a friend. Our boys have been best friends since birth; I can’t tell you the number of times a phone call from her has kept me sane. As they start High School in the fall I foresee many more deep conversations with my dear friend.

It was no accident that God sent a Titus 2 friend into my life! She has taught me so much!! And she made having a BIG family look like so much fun that we just had to join in!!

God has blessed us with 6 Amazing children!! My heart is full because of them!!

It was no accident that at the wise age of 24 (yeah right) I was allowed to teach 4 beautiful teenage girls in Sunday School. Looking back I can see that I didn’t have much to teach, but I have been blessed beyond measure by their friendship over the years!! They have each grown into amazing women who love God and I got to be a very small part of that!

It was no accident that on June 2, 2010 our baby girl was born with Down Syndrome.

It was no accident that God took the time to send me a little preparation.
I posted this on Facebook 5 days after Karsyn was born. (Posted on June 7, 2010) I thought I would share this with everyone. It’s just amazing to me to think that God loves us so much that He takes the time to send things our way that He knows will help us down the road.

A couple of months ago I took Tristyn and Corbin to the eye doctor, while we were sitting in the waiting room a little girl with Down Syndrome came in and sat down right by me. She started talking to me. She was asking me about the baby in my belly and all sorts of other things. Her Dad kept telling her to leave me alone, but I said, “No, she’s fine”. She was such a sweetheart, we talked for quite a while, and if you know me; you know how unusual that is. As she walked away the thought entered my mind, “I wonder if God sent her to me because this baby has Down Syndrome??”

I shared that story with only one person, but after that I never thought about it again until Wednesday June 2, 2010 at 1:30 when the doctor told us that our baby girl has Down Syndrome. Although there were many tears and will probably still be many more, God’s Peace and Grace flooded my heart immediately. He reminded me of that precious little girl I had met that day. I’m so thankful that He cares so much about us and He reassures us that His way is perfect. It might not be the plan that we had made, but His plan is always far better!!!!

It was no accident that as a terrified Mom of a new baby girl with Down Syndrome. When I was weighed down with all of the questions and fears of the unknown, God sent our very first therapist to us. She walks into our home, offers a smile and a hug and says “My 3 1/2 year old son has Down Syndrome and HE ROCKS IT! Let me tell you how awesome your baby girl is!” It was no accident that she has become so much more than Karsyn’s therapist, she has also become my sweet friend.

It was no accident that this same friend would give me the name of a speech therapist that could help my older daughter. You see, we had this plan to introduce her to Karsyn while she was seeing Tristyn. Our hope was that she would agree to add one more baby to her caseload, even though she was getting out of Early Steps. Yes, we were a little devious but thankfully it worked and Karsyn gained the best SLP!! (Sorry Michelle!!)

It was no accident that I decided to start running! (You know I have to throw that in there). Every week for the past 3 years I have sat in the room with Tristyn and Karsyn’s Speech Therapist. I loved her for helping my girls but our friendship was on a professional level. When she offered to help me with my new dream of running, God took us both on a journey and united our hearts!! I cherish her as one of my dearest friends.

A few weeks ago during one of Karsyn’s therapy sessions, she said, “I have been waiting all week to share this story with you.” The Chicken Runs at Midnight. You have to take the time to watch this video. It pretty much sums up this whole blog post.

It was no accident that my friend Meghan and I were at that 1992 Playoff game!!

You can make the choice for yourself. You can choose to believe that everything happens in your life by chance.

I choose to believe that the same God, who created this world, and loved it so much that He sent His Son to die for me that I might live, loves me enough to beautifully orchestrate every move in my life. I choose to live with my eyes wide open!!

As you run through this life, I challenge you to open your heart and eyes to Him!!!

Dig Deep and Keep Running

As a little girl I dreamt about what my life would be like when I grew up. I remember playing this game called M.A.S.H. 

Here’s how to play:  

You get a piece of paper and choose your categories. 

Basic M.A.S.H. consists of only four categories:

M.A.S.H. (Mansion, Apartment, Shack, House)

People to Marry

Number of Kids

Type of Car

You write down four options under each category, then you choose your number and eventually you eliminate all but one under each category.

And there you have it, everything you need to know about your future.

Am I the only kid who played this game??

The sad thing is under each category was the best of the best. Unrealistic!! You grow up thinking that your life will only be “perfect” if you can somehow manage to end up with all these things.  Don’t get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with having nice things!  Someone once told me, “Don’t apologize for the blessings of God in your life.”  God is so good and He gives way more than we deserve, there’s no doubt about that. What happens when the “perfect” life turns out different than you dreamt??

You know what I’ve found out? Different is SCARY!!!

We were devastated when minutes after Karsyn was born the doctor told us that he suspected she has Down Syndrome.  My mind immediately went back to a few weeks earlier when I looked at my precious family and said “Look, Matt how beautiful they all are, just one more and our family will be perfectly complete.”  I can promise you my idea of perfect was not for our baby to have Down Syndrome. I can’t explain to you the overwhelming feeling of grief.  The dreams that we walked in with that day changed in a moment.  We were thrown into a whole new world full of unknowns!!

I know I never wrote down on that piece of paper that I wanted a child with special needs. I’m not sure anyone wishes that for themselves.

Why is different so scary??  It shouldn’t be!!!

I think different is better!

I’ve said hundreds of times in the past 3 years, “Karsyn has changed our family for the better!!” Our family would not be perfect without her!!  She is the most amazing little girl you will ever meet!  I promise if you are blessed enough to have her in your life you will agree that she makes it better! 

I know you are probably asking yourself, “What does this have to do with running?”  

I’m glad you asked!!

Because of Karsyn, we have been introduced to so many people and opportunities that we would never have known existed.  Recently, we were introduced to an incredible organization called Ainsley’s Angels.  The “Angels” (runners) push the “Captains” (individuals with disabilities) in local races.  What a great experience to run alongside these amazing people!!!  It’s life changing!!  So far Karsyn has run in 2 races, we love it!!!  She is my INSPIRATION.  She has to work so hard to do so many things we take for granted, yet she never quits and never complains!!  I have decided to start running with the same attitude that she lives every day. 

This past Saturday we ran the Contraband 5-miler. I loved that I was able to run with Karsyn, but I was very disappointed in myself.  I’ve been running for 5 months, and I’m really not getting any better.  

After the race I asked my friend Michelle, “Why am I not getting better??”  I seriously think Michelle missed her calling in life (not really she rocks at her job) but she is also a great motivator.  She always says something that helps me, and probably more than she ever intended.  So let me share her response to my question, “You know why?  It’s partly because you let yourself quit too easy, and partly because you haven’t learned to hurt.  Running is hard, it’s nothing but your brain, heart, legs and lungs fighting with the pavement.  There’s no back up; no one to tag team, no one to get your back, no way to coast and catch your breath. It’s just you and your inner demons vs. your inner drive.  Running reveals what you’re made of like no other sport because you are all you have to rely on.  If you want to get better, you have to dig deep inside and see what’s there. It’s the same amazing woman who bore and is raising 6 amazing kids. It’s in there YOU JUST WON’T LET IT OUT!!!!!  Your constant use of the words “I CAN’T” is the core of your struggle. Change that and everything else will fall in place.”

Okay, so I’m taking her words of wisdom and I’m using my sweet little girl as all the inspiration and example I need.  I CAN do this!!!!  I CAN get better!!

Spiritual Application:

Life is never easy!!!  We all have times in our life where we have to dig deep and see what we are made of.  We can overcome anything that comes our way.

1 John 4:4: because greater is he that is in you, than he that is in the world.  

God will use trials in our lives to make us stronger!!  

“It takes us experiencing the hurt and feeling the pain to realize who we are and how strong God is!!”