Everyone You Meet In Life Has A Story

I just had an amazing weekend doing things I NEVER thought I would be doing. I think sometimes it’s good to share your story. So I’m going to try and make a very long story short, and tell you what led me to the place I am at today.

It’s been almost 5 years, but seems like just yesterday. There comes a time in your life when you get tired of just doing the same thing over and over. You want your life to have a significant purpose. Matt and I were both at that place. He was on a Missions trip to the Dominican Republic helping to build a church and I was home with our five kids and one on the way. I remember lying in bed with this burning desire in my heart, begging God to send us somewhere to do something big for Him. Matt came home with a love and desire for God that I had never seen before. We both knew that God was calling us to DO something. So we surrendered to Him, we put our newly built house up for sale and planned to leave for missionary training school two months after our 6th baby was to be born. We had plans to do something GREAT for God!! Surely this is what God wanted for us, BUT God had other plans. Instead of giving us the baby that would fit into our plans, He gave us Karsyn. He took our world and all the plans we made and turned them upside down. Those were some very dark days. We were trying to sort out what this meant for our family.  We sold our house a few months after Karsyn was born. We were still in the dark as to what God was up to!! I’m not going to tell you that my faith was strong and I walked with God every step of the way. I cried, I questioned, and I doubted everything!!! I even became bitter at times that He wasn’t going along with our plans.

Now I have a baby with a disability and my beautiful home is gone. Not exactly the way I had dreamed it!! Karsyn would need lots of therapy!!! I was overwhelmed and a little obsessed with trying to get every kind of therapy I thought she needed. She was seeing OT, PT and Speech through Early Steps, and I was taking her to private OT and PT. It was very expensive and exhausting!!! When you are handed a baby with a diagnosis you know nothing about you just want to make sure you are doing everything you can to give her what she needs to succeed!! The first few years were tough emotionally, physically and financially.

 

God has sent SO many people to us. Therapists and Teachers who choose to love us both!! I can totally understand why they would love my sweet girl, but why they love her crazy Mama too is definitely a God thing!! Just like all the therapists and teachers before God continues to faithfully send us someone to love us both!!! Her teacher has been VERY patient with me and has fallen in love with my girl!!!!

 

I love to look back and see God’s hand in our life.

 

One year after we sold our house the people we sold it to, sold it back to us!! Sounds crazy???!! It’s true!!! How often does that happen?? Definitely a God thing!!

 

Out of nowhere, God put a desire to Run in my heart. I had never ran a day in my life!!! I was athletic and played sports but running was not one of the sports I loved!!

 

I knew Michelle, Karysn’s Speech Therapist, was a runner so one day I mentioned to her I was thinking about running a 5K. From that simple conversation God opened up a whole new world. Every day we are both AMAZED at what has come of it.

 

First, she has become one of the dearest friends in my life. She lit a fire that had gone out in me. I remember one of our first runs she said God wants you to do this. I called Matt on my way home and told him. He pretty much thought I was crazy.

 

Two years later….He does not think I’m crazy anymore!!! Only God could have taken that desire and turned it into what it has become!!

 

We were introduced to Ainsley’s Angels a little over a year ago. What an awesome ministry of lending your legs to those in need. I can’t count the people we have been able to share God’s love with because of running.

 

God put another desire in my heart….Triathlons!! My plan was for Karysn and I to do them together!!! I contacted AA and asked if this would be possible. In true AA fashion they said of course and made it happen. They purchased all the equipment! We were all set!! All we had to do was wait for the Tri season to start!!

 

In the meantime they sent us on an unforgettable trip to Holland, MA. It was in Holland where our friendship began with the Warner family. Lanie Warner touched my heart and left a lasting impression on me.

 

So it’s time for Karysn and I to start training for our first triathlon together!! I was pumped!!! BUT once again God looked at our plans and laughed!!! Karsyn who loved the water all of the sudden wants nothing to do with it!! NOTHING!!! So, what do we do? AA already bought all this equipment we can’t just forget about it!! God reminded me of that sweet girl I met in Holland!! So I sent her Mom a message asking if she would be interested in taking Karsyn’s place?? I think she was a little hesitant but decided to give it a try!! It was a HUGE success!!! Lanie rocked it!!!

 

So, is that it?? We just do that one Tri and call it a day??? No way!! AA willingly expanded their organization and added a Tri division. I have no idea why they chose me but I am blessed to be the Tri coordinator. In just four months we have grown from one captain to four in our AASWLA chapter. Our South Texas chapter now has a Tri team. ( I’d like to think we inspired that!!) AND our Mississippi Chapter will soon join us!! (I hope anyway haha)

 

God works in mysterious ways!!!

 

Karsyn didn’t mess up the plan. She is THE PLAN!!!! Wow, God sure writes a better story than I could ever write on my own!!! What a gift!!!

 

God can take ordinary people and do extraordinary things!!!

 

I could not have planned this!!! His ways are higher than ours!!

 

I can’t wait to see what else He has in store!! This is an incredible journey!!!!!!

 

 

Dig Deep and Keep Running

As a little girl I dreamt about what my life would be like when I grew up. I remember playing this game called M.A.S.H. 

Here’s how to play:  

You get a piece of paper and choose your categories. 

Basic M.A.S.H. consists of only four categories:

M.A.S.H. (Mansion, Apartment, Shack, House)

People to Marry

Number of Kids

Type of Car

You write down four options under each category, then you choose your number and eventually you eliminate all but one under each category.

And there you have it, everything you need to know about your future.

Am I the only kid who played this game??

The sad thing is under each category was the best of the best. Unrealistic!! You grow up thinking that your life will only be “perfect” if you can somehow manage to end up with all these things.  Don’t get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with having nice things!  Someone once told me, “Don’t apologize for the blessings of God in your life.”  God is so good and He gives way more than we deserve, there’s no doubt about that. What happens when the “perfect” life turns out different than you dreamt??

You know what I’ve found out? Different is SCARY!!!

We were devastated when minutes after Karsyn was born the doctor told us that he suspected she has Down Syndrome.  My mind immediately went back to a few weeks earlier when I looked at my precious family and said “Look, Matt how beautiful they all are, just one more and our family will be perfectly complete.”  I can promise you my idea of perfect was not for our baby to have Down Syndrome. I can’t explain to you the overwhelming feeling of grief.  The dreams that we walked in with that day changed in a moment.  We were thrown into a whole new world full of unknowns!!

I know I never wrote down on that piece of paper that I wanted a child with special needs. I’m not sure anyone wishes that for themselves.

Why is different so scary??  It shouldn’t be!!!

I think different is better!

I’ve said hundreds of times in the past 3 years, “Karsyn has changed our family for the better!!” Our family would not be perfect without her!!  She is the most amazing little girl you will ever meet!  I promise if you are blessed enough to have her in your life you will agree that she makes it better! 

I know you are probably asking yourself, “What does this have to do with running?”  

I’m glad you asked!!

Because of Karsyn, we have been introduced to so many people and opportunities that we would never have known existed.  Recently, we were introduced to an incredible organization called Ainsley’s Angels.  The “Angels” (runners) push the “Captains” (individuals with disabilities) in local races.  What a great experience to run alongside these amazing people!!!  It’s life changing!!  So far Karsyn has run in 2 races, we love it!!!  She is my INSPIRATION.  She has to work so hard to do so many things we take for granted, yet she never quits and never complains!!  I have decided to start running with the same attitude that she lives every day. 

This past Saturday we ran the Contraband 5-miler. I loved that I was able to run with Karsyn, but I was very disappointed in myself.  I’ve been running for 5 months, and I’m really not getting any better.  

After the race I asked my friend Michelle, “Why am I not getting better??”  I seriously think Michelle missed her calling in life (not really she rocks at her job) but she is also a great motivator.  She always says something that helps me, and probably more than she ever intended.  So let me share her response to my question, “You know why?  It’s partly because you let yourself quit too easy, and partly because you haven’t learned to hurt.  Running is hard, it’s nothing but your brain, heart, legs and lungs fighting with the pavement.  There’s no back up; no one to tag team, no one to get your back, no way to coast and catch your breath. It’s just you and your inner demons vs. your inner drive.  Running reveals what you’re made of like no other sport because you are all you have to rely on.  If you want to get better, you have to dig deep inside and see what’s there. It’s the same amazing woman who bore and is raising 6 amazing kids. It’s in there YOU JUST WON’T LET IT OUT!!!!!  Your constant use of the words “I CAN’T” is the core of your struggle. Change that and everything else will fall in place.”

Okay, so I’m taking her words of wisdom and I’m using my sweet little girl as all the inspiration and example I need.  I CAN do this!!!!  I CAN get better!!

Spiritual Application:

Life is never easy!!!  We all have times in our life where we have to dig deep and see what we are made of.  We can overcome anything that comes our way.

1 John 4:4: because greater is he that is in you, than he that is in the world.  

God will use trials in our lives to make us stronger!!  

“It takes us experiencing the hurt and feeling the pain to realize who we are and how strong God is!!”

Running is HARD!!

Running has to be the hardest thing I have ever tried to do. 

I have always loved playing sports, some of my favorite childhood memories are meeting my cousins on the football field where we would play for hours.   Joe Montana (aka me), John Elway (aka John Jr.)  & Thomas (I can’t remember who he pretended to be lol)  

Then there were those special occasions when Uncle John would come out and be our ‘All-Time QB’!!  You would have thought we were in the playoffs.  This was SERIOUS stuff!! (Often ending on not so friendly terms lol) What a special guy my Uncle John is to me!  He would even let me practice with the High School football team!! I’ll never forget the game where I heard him say, “Ra Ra, I’m putting you in!!”  Do you have any idea how excited I was about this??  Unfortunately, my Dad quickly dashed those dreams!!  Which I so kindly remind him of from time to time!!  Poor Dad!! 🙂 

I think that’s the day I learned; I better find sports that girls are allowed to play!!   I think that is how Matt and I fell in love!  Who wouldn’t love a girl who could beat him in a game of one on one?? 😉  So, since sports are in my blood I really thought this whole running thing would be a piece of cake.  All you do is RUN!!   I’ll never forget the second time Michelle and I ran together.  She told me “Quit knocking my sport, you’re just mad because this is hard for you.”  She was right!!  I don’t know how she had me figured out so soon but she’s good!  It didn’t take me long (at all) to find a deep respect for all you runners out there!! 

You want to know my biggest problem??  ME!!  The entire time I’m running I focus on how hard this is. I’m waiting for the moment I start to feel uncomfortable, then I’m done!!  I can’t break through (except on the days that I run with Michelle).  Why?  Because she literally gets behind me and pushes me when I stop running!  Her advice, “You have to get comfortable with being uncomfortable.”  So, that’s where I am right now.  My next race is in three weeks!!!  I better start learning to get uncomfortable.  I have to focus on something/anything other than “how hard this is!!”

Now, you know I have to apply this to my Spiritual Life!!

I have to share with you one of my journal entries:  

January 13, 2013: Today I drove the route that Michelle and I have run 3 times.  As I drove, I noticed all of these beautiful, amazing, massive homes along the lakefront. The scenery was breathtaking. The sad thing is I never noticed it before. I was so focused on how hard it is to keep running that I somehow missed all of this beauty that surrounded every step!

Life Lesson Learned:  Life is hard!!!  We all have situations in our lives that we have to deal with.  But if we focus on how hard it is we will miss all of the beauty and blessings that God has surrounded us with.  Lift up your head and look around!!  God’s handiwork in your life is quite breathtaking!!

Psalm 27:13 I had fainted, unless I had believed to see the goodness of The Lord in the land of the living.